The Silence is loud

LORD, the silence is so loud.

So heavy upon me.

I hear the whir of the AC and the fans.

I hear the vehicles on the road outside.

But still. there is silence.

No voices other than mine.

No sound of breathing or snoring, other than mine.

It’s easy to turn on the music or a TV show/movie to mask the silence.

Whether I actually watch them or not.

Whether I even listen to them or not. 

Just the noise - for the background of my life. 

LORD, I need a buffer zone of silence around me to focus on things that are unseen.

Unheard.

We walk by Faith, not by sight – nor sound.

And yet, sometimes the silence is so very loud that I cannot think.

Sometimes I actually need another voice to focus my attention on things to do, or write, or even read.

I’ve always been that way – but as a widow, it now seems even more so.

How do I not let my senses dominate my thinking, my emotions?

How do I be alone in the stillness and quiet?

How do I focus when there are no voices other than mine?

How do I be aware, alert, to the unseen things, living by Faith – even as I live this life in a visible and hearing world?

: II Corinthians 4:16-18 – So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.

• LORD, I feel like I need this tattooed on the underside of my eyelids so that with every blink of my eye I read these Words of Life and Hope.

: Isaiah 6:3 – And one called to the another and said: “Holy, Holy, Holy is the Lord of hosts; the whole earth is full of His Glory!”

• BLESSED be the NAME of the LORD our GOD . . .

: Psalm 119:18 – Open my eyes, that I may behold wondrous things out of Your Law.

• YES, LORD, yes!

: Psalm 130:5-6 – I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in His Word I hope; my soul waits for the Lord more than watchmen for the morning, more than watchmen for the morning.

• LORD, teach me how to wait . . . and not miss YOU 😉