Teach me . . .

I sit here this morning with coffee and a gazillion thoughts.

I have a list of “to-do’s” that pound against my brain – screaming at me.

If it hasn’t happened yet, it is dangerously close – that this to do list is an idol.

Not to be adored.

But to be feared.

To be obeyed.

One that directs my moments, my life.

I don’t like those thoughts, I don’t want that to happen.

LORD, help me please.

I ask that YOUR SPIRIT will guide me, direct my steps, moment by moment – even if I get nothing accomplished that is on “the list” for today!

I cannot control, nor even fix, my life – let alone the lives of those around me, those that I hold so dear to my heart and soul.

As much as I want to – GOD, it is too much for me.

Psalm 131.

Please, teach me how to live in conversation with YOU.

That constant communion, realizing that YOU really are my Constant Companion.

I remember when Rick was alive and whether he was working that day, or not – we talked.

We continued our life from the day (or days) before.

We didn’t get up every morning and get married all over again.

We just went with the day, or the night.

We lived a conversational life.

A life of being companions.

There were those intimate times when we drew away from the world, from life – and we focused intently on one another.

But there were more of the cluttered and crazy times where all we could do was share a look, a smile, a light touch of the fingers.

Life is crazy and cluttered.

Seems more so now that I am living alone.

I want that simple life, so that communication with YOU is easy.

But there are places to go, things to do, people to deal with, issues of life that demand attentions.

GOD, how do I let go of that fantasy “easy life” with little to no clutter – spiritually, emotionally, mentally, physically or financially?

GOD, how do I accept each day as it comes, and find YOU in the midst of it all?

Please, teach me YOUR Ways.

: I Thessalonians 5:17 – Pray without ceasing.

• Whether I write this praying, or speak it out loud. Maybe I can’t do either – just cry out with my heart and soul. LORD, YOU see my life. YOU hear my cries. YOU know.

: Proverbs 3:5-6 – Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make straight your paths.

• These 2 verses have become a mantra of sorts for me since being a widow. All I can do is cry out to JESUS, and hold to YOUR Promises. Please, take me by the hand and walk me through this.

: Galatians 5:25 – If we live by the Spirit, let us also keep in step with the Spirit.

• LORD, teach me how to keep in step with YOUR SPIRIT. Please.